SO it was about half past eight last Saturday night when I offered streak round the track at Berwick.
It’s not something I’d usually consider doing under normal circumstances, you understand, but then Saturday was nothing like a run of the mill night at the speedway.
The official word from the Bandits hierarchy was that a total of 67 minutes was lost due to delays for one reason or another during the Ecco Finishing Bears’ Premier League clash at Shielfield Park last weekend.
Sixty-seven minutes. More than an hour. A third of the time England were meaningfully involved in the World Cup. I’m sure I spent more time waiting for my pizza at the takeaway around the corner to be cooked and I swear I’ve been to meetings at Berwick that have been done and dusted in less time than that.
First of all Bears old boy Matej Kus complained of feeling unwell, causing medical staff to go scurrying into the pits to attend to him.
That in itself was a surprise to those of us with no prior knowledge of his wellbeing since he’d been flying around the track like he owned it but his condition was severe enough to necessitate a county ambulance being called which left us twiddling our thumbs for, as it transpired, not the last time.
Once outside assistance arrived for the stricken Matej, it was then just a case of sticking the two-minute warning siren on and we’d be back in business wouldn’t we? Well no actually.
The dulcet tones of Dick Barrie were soon echoing around the stadium again to inform us that the paramedic had now fallen ill and had been stood down.
A replacement doctor was en route from Kelso, around half an hour away, however after he selflessly pushed aside the tasty half-eaten meal he’d been tucking into, threw down his serviette and and jumped Berwick-bound into his car.
It was around about this time I took to Twitter to suggest a quick streak might liven things up a bit while we were stood around waiting for something to happen. It was a nice night after all, and I was even offered a fiver to go ahead and do it.
But Dr Fortune made a timely appearance that ensured I kept my kit on and that, it has to be said, was best for all concerned
And the hero doc had barely time to pack away his cape before he was called into action following a nasty spill involving Matthew Wethers. Cue another hold-up.
All of that meant we only had time for 10 races before having to call a halt to prevent the old geezer in the house over by the back straight getting on the phone to the Noise Abatement Society.
So the Bears came away with a most welcome and, if I’m honest, unexpected point but I still reckon it could have been more if it had gone the distance.