I AM Teesside’s very own Time Lord and I am preparing to step into my Tardis and embark on a journey to a parallel point in the universe.
Actually it will be a Land Rover not an actual Tardis but they are quite spacious inside and it never creases to amaze me how much room there is inside. More comfortable than an old Police phone box too.
But you get the picture.
And I shall have not one but four lovely assistants to accompany me on my epic voyage to a dark and distant point somewhere on yonder side of the space time continuum.
So ha ha, Doctor Who with your ability to alter your cellular structure, two hearts and little silver magic thing that looks like a tyre pressure gauge.
You might be able to kill Daleks and Cybermen but you only have one assistant while I shall be travelling with a further three. And they’ll all be wearing Redcar Bears shirts.
For this weekend, along with my trusty time-travelling companions Charlotte, Frances, Janice and Claire, I shall be bidding farewell to 21st century Marske-by-the-Sea and heading back to Poland 1984.
OK, it’s actually a hotel in Cardiff but it may as well be a Soviet-constructed Cold War era apartment somewhere just east of Warsaw.
Amazingly we keep going back year after year – probably due to the fact it’s cheap and a not too strenuous walk from the Millennium Stadium, home of the British Speedway Grand Prix.
But I’ll never forget the first time I pulled into the car park, to be faced with a stark, shabby structure – its dull, grey facade punctuated only by square aluminium-framed windows. All that was missing was a car park full of Trabants.
The inside wasn’t much better either although, to be fair, the stain on the ceiling wasn’t too big and didn’t seem to grow much during the course of the weekend.
But you know what? None of it mattered.
Because when the Grand Prix comes to Cardiff, the city centre is THE place to be. It’s Party Central, a time and a place for speedway fans from all over Europe to get together, have fun and enjoy their favourite sport’s most special spectacle.
And if Cardiff is the main course for this weekend of sport and revelry, then the PL Pairs at Somerset the previous evening is the hors d’ouevres. With fans from (almost) all the clubs in the Premier League, there’s always a carnival atmosphere at the Oak Tree Arena and the racing’s usually pretty decent too.
Mustn’t forget the draught scrumpy on sale trackside too, even if it does have a rather pungent aroma
Yes, it’s THE big weekend on the speedway calendar and I can’t wait for it to start.