I KNOW where you are – and I know what you are thinking.
Oh yes, Mystic Mart has you sussed.
No, I’m not going to go all Derek Acorah on you and scream “Dere’s been a meeeeeerder” or “His name is John” in a gratingly whiney Scouse accent.
Nor am I going to pen you a cyptically-written note and tell you not to open it until the stroke of midnight.
But nonethless I can see into your soul.
You’re sitting at home or at your workplace, maybe even rocking gently, with a pained expresssion on your face and you’re thinking “what am I going to do on a Thursday night between now and March?”
I’m right, aren’t I?
The close season – that vast void of nothingness between the last race of the previous season and the eagerly-awaited first rising of the tapes the following spring.
Punctuated only by rumours of who might and might not be coming and going and which crazy and unfathomable rule the BSPA will throw in to keep us on our toes this time, it seems to go on forever.
There’s even more for the rumour mongers to get their teeth into this time too, with Glyn Taylor announcing he’s had enough after only one season in charge, speculation aplenty that the Premier League is to split down the middle and thoughts of what the STMP stadium will look like when we walk through the gates next spring.
And although there will be no Bears action until next March, In the Pits will continue to be updated through the winter as the full picture for 2009 begins to emerge.
Now then, I’m getting a vision of a man in a hat with a red anorak and a programme board. . . .