It’s good (not) to talk

EVER said something and then immediately wished you’d kept your trap shut?


I have. I remember being on holiday with my mates in Magaluf when when we decided it would be a good idea to ask a total stranger in the bar where we’d been drinking for longer than was either healthy or necessary to take a ‘team line-up’ photo of the lads ‘on tour’.
Unfortunately the bloke I asked only had one arm, which I hadn’t actually noticed at the time. Must have been the San Miguel.
To his credit, though, he duly obliged and he took a nice picture, albeit a little blurry and and at about a 45 degree angle.
Fast forward to last Tuesday at South Tees Motorsports Park where Gazette snapper Peter Reimann (who, and I’ve just checked this to make absolutely certain, has two fully functional arms) took a photo of the Bears team ahead of their match with Sheffield.
It was the first time the Bears had been at full strength since March, so it was worthy of a photo.
And that’s when I uttered the words: “We’d better get team picture while we can!”
Redcar Bears team
I should have known better. I have a mate who still holds a deep-rooted grudge against me for comments made during England’s vital Euro 2004 match against Portugal.
Luis Figo, one of the best players in the world, had been taken off and replaced by Helda Postiga. England were 2-1 up at the time and I was in high spirits.
Amid a cacophony of mates yelling “nooooooooooooooooo” at me and threatening physical injury, I boldly predicted: “That’s us through, then! They’ve taken off one of the best players in the world and replaced him with Helda Postiga. he’s crap – and he plays for Tottenham.”
The inevitable happened – Postiga equalised and Portugal won on penalties.
So I should have learned my lesson. That really was the last opportunity to grab a picture of those seven riders together, with Dan Giffard now likely to miss the rest of the season.
So if you hear me mutter “that’s this match in the bag, then,” “no, it definitely won’t rain tonight,” or “no honestly I don’t fancy a pint” – you have my permission to give me a stern talking to!

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